Lost Boy Scouts Podcast

Swell AI Transcript: S2 E1.wav
Danny: Welcome to Lost Boy Scouts podcast. Here we are.
Tyler: Welcome back January 2nd January 2nd first episode of the year coming out Friday. It'll be out Friday by the time we Cut it and edit it. So we're recording on Tuesday. Mm-hmm.

Danny: Yeah, it was a what a what a crazy last couple of weeks for myself.

Tyler: I got really sick. Yeah, I know, you were down and out.

Danny: Sick, man. Started off with a stomach issue at the Christmas party and then right into what I would perceive as a sinus infection that's still kind of lingering if you kind of hear me lose my voice or if I cough every once in a while and I'm trying my hardest not to. So, I was working on, you know, my breathing routines that was keeping me healthy and my goal was to be illness-free for a year. And my breathing routine was based around that. And I was doing really, really good, really good. And then all of a sudden I wasn't, and I was kind of bummed, I went 345 days of no sickness, but everyday breathing. And man, it knocked me on my butt. It was bad. I could tell, you were down and out. Yeah, it settled in. And everybody around us was like, oh yeah, I've got that sickness, I've got that sickness. And I'm thinking, man… I don't do sick very well.

Tyler: Yeah. I miss the, I miss the Christmas party because I had a cousin come into town. That's her, her Christmas present to herself and her, her, her young man. And, uh, they brought a cold and I was like, please don't bring that cold. But yeah, well, luckily we all stayed healthy for the holiday. Yeah. I had my kids through Christmas. We had an amazing Christmas spirited season. Again, just trying to change the focus, right? I did a deliberate gratitude practice for the month of November and I carried that into December. Again, just trying to change my outlook on the holidays rather than focusing on the tragedy, like focusing on the lessons learned. applauding myself, like, look at the times that were hard that I made it through, like, now let's enjoy the fat. You know what I mean? You know, when you focus on the negative, it compounds, right? That's all you see. That's your brain. You're programming that filter in your brain to just see that. And so, yeah, I'm trying to reprogram myself. Even going into the new year, even going into the new year, you know?

Danny: Yeah, and I'm the same way. I only got yelled at once this year, which was a goal for me. I usually get yelled at by Misty a couple of times about how I'm a Scrooge and how I make Christmas not fun, which agreed. I 100% agree. I don't conform to all of the buy a bunch of stuff. I don't like to go out and spend a bunch of money In itself, right, I'm pretty frugal. And Christmas I always think like my kids have everything, my wife has everything, why would I need to buy more stuff that you're not going to use? And when I was younger it was like her and I would fight every day about it. And this time, you know, every year I'm like, okay, don't. Don't ruin the spirit for her, because she loves Christmas. And so I only got yelled at once. But ours was so… Our Christmas was great. It really was great, except it was just uneventful. Braxton was on his way out here and he got stuck in the blizzard, had to turn around and drive back home. And so then it was kind of like… One of those lackluster things where you're just like the build-up of seeing him and meeting his family and then all of a sudden he's going home. So then you're like, okay, well Christmas is kind of blah. So Christmas Eve, I had to work and I was sick and I came home and I went right to sleep. Christmas Day, we had a good day, just Misty and I and Tristan. And then it was over. And then it was over.

Tyler: Dude, I totally get it. I-80 in a snowstorm is no joke, right? You get into that like flatlands, middle America, cornfields, there's nothing to block the snow from just blowing you off the road, from just covering the road and it's just an icy nightmare.

Danny: Scary. I told Misty, I was like, until you've driven on that, You don't understand. You have no idea. And it is terrifying to drive on that. And you think you're a good driver, right? Like you think, no, I've got this. I'm fine. Until you get on there and you're like, nope, not even a little bit.

Tyler: Yeah, heaven forbid you hit a patch of black ice and nobody, you know, safety is key. It is true. You don't need to kill yourself to get to the Christmases.

Danny: Do you think we put a lot of pressure on ourselves for the holidays? Like, do you think that's why people like, why like, You have so much depression, so much animosity, so much aggressiveness. Everybody is like, oh, I'm so happy for the holidays. And the first thing they say is, I'm so glad they're over.

Tyler: Yes. Right? Yeah. Yeah, I mean, so my favorite tradition is watching Christmas Vacation. Absolutely, hands down, one of my favorite Christmas movies. You know, you watch Clark Griswold, he starts with these just absolutely unachievable, wanting to make it the best. And I think we all start out that way. You know, we all want to have the downtime, like I enjoy the downtime off of work, you know, relaxing and just… you know, disconnecting and like really taking some time to think like what is important and you know, then you start getting your family involved and you got all these different dynamics and you're going back into, you know, relationships with family members which may or may not be strained, even if they're meant to be positive, even if they're meant to be jolly, you can kind of fake a look But you can't fake a vibration. And I've learned in my 40 years here on this planet, 40 plus years on this planet, that you… You can't make real friends with fake people, right? And so, if you're trying to fake it, that facade only holds up for so long before it starts to erode and then you start to erode and, you know, just keep… This year for me was about building a tradition, man. I smashed a prime rib. Like, I made the juiciest prime rib. It was good. Oh, it was so delicious. I want to make another one just because I was so proud of it. It was like… I sous vide it for like nine hours and then I reverse roasted it and it was just juicy and delicious. And I've never cooked that kind of way before, but I was stoked on preparing a meal for my kids. It was just me and my kids. for both Christmas Eve and Christmas dinner. Oh good. We did it, you know, the traditional ham and we smoked a ham on the Traeger and like it was, everything was like, it was just laid back and chill. We watched movies and hung out. We played games. We picked up a new game that we learned how to play. Um, called protect your assets. It's a, it's a lot of fun. Was it good? Oh yeah. We, we, and we just enjoyed each other's company, right? We didn't put, we went down and visited my father, um, and spent Christmas Eve with him and had brunch at his house and you know, just. just enough time to connect and continue to build that relationship, but not enough time where you're all trapped in that Clark Griswold house where things start to erode.

Danny: Which is the point, which is the goal, right? To have the holiday spirit, to not lose the holiday spirit, and to not get into that moment where you're like, you know what? I'm mad at everybody. I'm pissed. And I want you all to go home. And I don't want to be here anymore. And I don't want to do this shit anymore. And I want to be done with the holidays. And I'm lucky because I don't have to go out into the masses and be around all those people and get the claustrophobic of everybody trying to find the right gift and find the right… What happened there?

Tyler: That's still recording, but it's just frozen. So we're going to just hope that it works.

Danny: And our screen is frozen. Yeah. I'm looking over there and I'm thinking, what the heck? Yeah. Um, yeah. And, and, and that's the thing is like, you don't want to get, you don't want to lose the holiday spirit. You don't, you want to like have fun. You want to, you want to make sure that your people are having fun. Whether you're around each other enough or whether you're not just man, keep the holiday spirit. Don't lose it. And once you start to feel yourself losing it, then regroup. take a moment and take a minute to remind yourself of what you're doing this for. Because it's not the commercialism about it. It's about spending time with your family, creating some traditions and then following through on those traditions. And I think we did a good job. I think that my family is there creating those traditions and we're not all together and that's kind of sad you know, Braxton's a lot older now and Tristan will get to that point where he's older, you know, and so we'll have to find our, our, our, our vibration.

Tyler: Yeah. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I love the, I love a Christmas, good Christmas tradition. Right. But don't get so entrenched in it that it becomes the facade. Right. Like don't, don't just put on airs because that's what you do. Like make it meaningful, make it about the people you're with. And you know, I, I, um, You know, I had the opportunity, the blessed opportunity to have Christmases with in-laws at one point that were, they were awesome, but they were always, they always seemed to be so mired in tradition that like, The tradition itself didn't allow for other people to contribute. And probably part of that was my fault, not knowing my place in that ecosystem where I live. I saw an interesting meme over the holidays that was this dude on TikTok. He'd snuck back in under the tree after Christmas and he was like, look at all this stuff. Look at all these clothes He had bought his girl He bought our all these clothes all like a purse like all this stuff and he was he goes look what I got He was they're not even name-brand not even name-brand Nike socks. He got a pack of Hanes socks and he spent all this money and that's the kind of shit that I hate like Why? Why does it have to be a comparison? Why does it have to be about what's under the tree? Even as I shop for my kids this year, I'm like, man, my kids, they have a lot of needs, you know, things that they need. They have a lot of things that they want. And I get there some excitement as a kid about, you know, getting presents and, you know, really celebrating. I tried really hard this year to get things that were meaningful and things that they would want and use and not forget about. I'm willing to bet that if I were to ask my kids what they got for Christmas last year, they wouldn't remember. Agreed. They may not even remember what they got this year. Sure. You know what I mean? And it's only been a week and a half. And I'm not saying that they weren't grateful. And I'm not saying like, I think they approached everything with gratitude, but like when we focus on the commercialism of it, it loses all meaning.

Danny: It does. And then it puts you in a bad mood. It puts you grumpy because then you're pissed because if you are, if you don't get the excitement that you're looking for from the gift that you just spent all this time, like trying to put your time and effort to get this great gift and the person just goes, Oh, thanks. Throws it to the side and you're like, And I put some effort into that. Is that not cool? And especially as men, there's a lot of burden that falls on us, a lot of pressure that falls on us to follow through, to make sure that everything is good, to make sure the tree is good, to make sure the presents are good, to make sure the presentation is good, to make sure that the breakfast is good, to make sure that the dinner is good, to make sure that all of these things are good. And if you're not careful as a man, you're going to get to that moment where you're like, No, I'm not going to do that. And then you may look at yourself as a failure. And then what happened starts your year off shitty. Because now you're like, people are pissed at you. Your family is like, why are you being such a dick, man? What did we do to you? And you don't know how to internalize or externalize why you're upset. And it may be just that the pressure got to you. Oh, absolutely.

Tyler: And it happens. I mean, it happens.

Danny: It happens to us all. Always. We definitely have some traditions that we do. We watch the same movies, you know, on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. This was the first year that I was scheduled to work in a long time. I didn't end up working because I ended up being able to get the day off, but I didn't know I was going to have the day off until the day of. So we really couldn't make any formulative plans, you know what I mean? By all means, put yourself in a good place and a good spot to have a good holiday, festivities, to have good holidays and to look back on them with joy. Because not everybody has that ability, not everybody has family to look back on, not everybody has that. And you have to remind yourself that, that you, what you have is special and not everybody has that.

Tyler: Yeah, no, yeah. And, you know, approach it all with gratitude. Approach it all with gratitude. Even if it sucks, even if you are alone, you know, there's lessons to be learned. And that's what life is all about. Learning lessons, right? And if you personalize that shit and say, oh, shit is shitty. Yeah, you're gonna program that part of your brain.

Danny: And that's how you're, it's hard to get out of that little funk. Yeah. Especially when, if you start to see like Instagram stories or like people talk about how great their life is and how amazing their holidays are. And you're like, my holidays are not that amazing. And now you're reflecting on yourself, but like also blaming them for your, the fact that you're having a shitty time. Right.

Tyler: Yeah, that's so true. I spent a lot of my life looking for external validation for an internal problem. The internal problem was that I just didn't validate myself the way I needed to validate myself. I didn't have the self-love, I didn't have the self-worth. It was programmed for whatever reason in the early days of my childhood that my emotional needs were not going to be met. It's taken me a long time to just look in and say, you know what, you are a badass. And I started a tradition last year and that brings us into like the new year. And people like take that seriously.

Danny: Yes. They take the new year and new year's resolutions and new year, new year, new me. Yes. Bullshit. Yes. To like the umpteenth level.

Tyler: Right. Right. Like the day that, you know, how packed was the gym? Oh, I'm assuming, I'm assuming, you know, I, I don't go to the gym. I actually really liked Jocko's take on it. I revamped and started listening to his, some of his stuff again. And his, his, his idea is that he doesn't do new year's resolutions. Because he's like, if I'm going to do something, I'm going to start today. I'm not going to wait. And I love that idea that like every day is a good day to start over. Like every day. If you are not happy, if you're not satisfied, cool, go to bed, wake up tomorrow and the sun's going to raise and like do it differently. Yeah. So new year, new you. I don't, I don't really do resolutions either.

Danny: Yeah. You have a really cool tradition that you passed on. And I shared that with a bunch of people. Because when you told me about it, I was like, oh, that's amazing. Yeah.

Tyler: What is it? So I write a letter to myself on Christmas Eve, or excuse me, New Year's Eve. A lot of Eves. I write, I write a letter to myself. Um, one just kind of congratulating myself for another year, another, another trip around the planet. Um, I will loosely put some like North stars in there, things that I wanted to do. So when I cracked open my letter, um, this, this, you know, new year's day, it was a letter to myself congratulating myself for, Um, obtaining my blue belt, which, you know, luckily I did, I did, um, for taking my children to Australia. We, we, we bagged Australia for Hawaii just due to flight costs and things like that. But so I consider that a success. Um, there was a couple other things in there that I know I didn't, I didn't come that close to, but it was really just a nice way to look at myself and just say, yeah, actually 2023, you know, it wasn't a dumpster fire. Yeah. It wasn't… I actually accomplished some pretty good things and I wrote a new letter to myself this year and I always try to incorporate a word. What is my word for the year going to be? What was last year's? Last year's was core. Getting back to myself. Yeah, so spending time on myself. Again, finding that validation, self-validation, self-love. This year's word is gratitude. I'm taking gratitude to the next level. I really believe it is the fertilizer for what is going to make everything that we're doing with all of the achievements I want to accomplish this year. It's going to be the fertilizer for the good things to come. I also have a generic theme. for the year. I didn't do a theme last year, but this was, you know, as I was listening to some different things around happiness, I decided I was going to incorporate a theme this year. And so my theme this year is SAP. Strength, Ambition and persistence. Again, hoping to get some stripes on that blue belt, hoping to start a couple of things that I'm not ready to announce yet, because you don't want to get high off of the vibe of telling about it, but just some north stars, some things that I want to work towards accomplishing.

Danny: And to keep you focused, to keep your guidance, right? To keep you going on the trajectory that you're supposed to be going. So in a roundabout way… So when Tyler told me this story, I was like, this is amazing. So you write it on the New Year's Eve of the prior year, and you don't even look at it until the following New Year's Day, right? So a full year, you're writing yourself a letter, from now a full year and you're telling yourself what you plan to accomplish, then you look back and you say, did I accomplish that? That's how I look at things. I look back at the year and I look, did I accomplish what I wanted to accomplish? Was I kind? Was I genuine? Did I make connections? Did I get further in my journey? Did I make progress? I don't want to look at a New Year's resolution that I have to hold myself accountable for every day, every single day, if I'm not ready for it, right? Because then I fail and then all of a sudden I'm back to square one on February 1st, because January 1st was like, oh, man, so excited, so excited in 31 days. And then you're like, shit, I didn't do everything that I want to do. And now you're like, kind of feel like a failure. Instead, you just look back on the year. Did you make progress? Yes.

Tyler: Yeah. Yeah. I think in addition to my, in my theme, I wrote on my mirror 1% better every day. And when we put these, these goals up there, they can be so crushing. They can be so crushing when you don't achieve. And heavy. And heavy. And then you, then you get stuck chasing. Oh, yeah. You get stuck chasing that goal and you get down on yourself if you don't accomplish that goal. So, yeah, for me, 1% better and attacking it with some strength, you know, some persistence and some ambition, man. I got super fired up after Christmas. I was like… There is so much opening up for me right now that like, I'm excited. I'm excited. And it revitalized some of my ambition for some of the goals. We're going to call them goals, but like some of the direction, the direction I want to take my life.

Danny: Like you're talking about the North Star stuff. Yeah. The fact that like, and when you're talking about those things, it's just, Seriously, it's just to keep you on the path. You're going to wander sometimes, you're not going to always do everything correctly. It's crazy to try to achieve perfection. Now, you can try to reach perfection, but achieving perfection, that's hard to do, because that's doing everything right every day without any kind of distractions. And that's how I like to look at it as well. Hey, these are my goals for the year. These are the things that I'm trying to reach. I approached you and I told you that I was going to stop drinking. And I didn't have a date. I don't have a date. Not that I was drinking a lot or not that I was like… It's just that I don't know if I… I had a conversation with Corey today and I was like, when you tell yourself that you have a healthy relationship with alcohol, You are so full of shit. Like a healthy relationship with alcohol, you're full of shit. There's no such thing. Now maybe I don't go crazy, maybe I don't get blackout drunk, maybe I'm not. But any kind of relationship with something like that, that draws your attention away or distracts you, that's not healthy. Just because you aren't on the street begging naked every once in a while because you're drunk all the time, Doesn't mean that my relationship with alcohol is good. No, I could not agree more. And that's what I look at it and I was like, hey, I'm gonna stop drinking. You're like, me too.

Tyler: Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I think when you want to accomplish great things, you have to be willing to do things that normally you wouldn't do. Agreed. If you want to accomplish something, you have to like, you have to dig a little bit, dig deep and find that perseverance, to really do it. And I think for me, like one of my goals is after competing this last year, I wanted to get down to a certain weight level and I'm like, I don't have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. But I do notice the times when one drink turns into three or four and I'm like, actually, I'm kind of sad. I'm feeling this emotion and I'm turning to alcohol for some sort of numbing of that emotion, right? The kids are gone or they've just left and I'm down because when they're not in my home, there's a void that I feel for not having them full-time. And so I've been there, I've turned that one drink into 3 or 4 or 5 or 6 and the next thing you know you've drank a whole 32 pack or whatever it is, right? And you don't feel great in the morning and it throws you off your path. You're not going to get up at the time you want to get up, you're going to be hungover. feel lousy and so for me it's an easy decision to make. One, it supports a health goal that I want to achieve this year. best beers have been after Jiu-Jitsu, right? Like when you earn it, it tastes great. And I think that's a healthy relationship, right? Like to celebrate with the guys you just rolled with, to replenish kind of some of those carbs and the salt. And I mean, it tastes fantastic, like nothing in the world. Maybe a beer on the beach in Mexico is equivalent when you like that first day of vacation. Other than, like I can think of very few times where I'm like, I'm doing this and I'm like, this is, this is really supporting who I want to be. Right.

Danny: And it's easy, like it's easy to, it's easy to have a battle buddy that's along the journey with you. Yes. And to be like, Hey man, like I'm not doing it. You're not doing it. And you can look to each other when you have those struggle moments. Right. Because same thing. I love a beer after training. I love it. I love the way it tastes. I love the way… I love that sound, right? But I also know that I have some really, really, really lofty goals. Yes. Really lofty goals of things that I want to accomplish, that I want to celebrate when I accomplish them, right? And I'm not going to celebrate these little tiny victories right now. I'm going to celebrate the big victories. Because little victories, they're happening every day for me. Every day, little victories. I'm 100% committed to a couple of things that I'm like, you know what, this is going to be little victories. And then the big victories are going to be huge. And I also think to myself, I'm going to set an example for people that if you, like, there's going to be people out there that that's what they do. They drink, you know? And if I can be a strong soul, a strong person to be like, nah, I'm good. I don't need a beer. Then maybe they can turn that corner. Turning the corner is huge with people, right? Having that, yeah, safety in numbers, not being the only person that says no. And so it's a big, it's a big, mindset. It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a healthy mindset to be like, to say, no, no, I'm good. I don't need it. Right. You know, I look in it and I'm thinking, man, Florida, no beer.

Tyler: Oh man.

Danny: How am I going to do Florida no beer?

Tyler: Yeah. I say no. Yeah, I'm gonna be good. I mean last year was so much fun But there were definitely some mornings where I was like, I ain't training this morning Yeah, I ain't training this morning. Yeah, and I went down there to train and to learn some jiu-jitsu Yeah, and you know, I I may have I probably forgot 90% what was there? Yeah, but I do remember every beer

Danny: It's so true. And that's the excitement of those things for me is when you look back on the year and you're like, man, I had a good year. When I look back on my year and I was like, Misty and I were talking and I was like, man, we had an amazing year. An amazing year. There were some things that we struggled with, there's some things that we need to improve on, but overall… We had a good year and that's how I want to look at things. Because nothing is guaranteed. When we talk about that death episode, nothing is guaranteed. Tomorrow is not guaranteed. Something can change. And what kind of legendary stories are they going to write about us? You know, if we're stuck in like a bottle, stuck in a beer, stuck in these little things that pull you down. And legendary status is achievable, it really is. And I think about that all the time. I want people to talk about me as if I'm a legend, right? And this is one of those things, being able to be like, no, I'm okay, I'm good, I'm going to pass on the beer right now. You know, I encourage everybody to really, really, really, really dig down deep and find something that's going to challenge you to that extent.

Tyler: Yeah, I think that's interesting. Like if you are struggling with setting a direction, I think one of the first things I did, and that's how I opened my letter for 2023, as I wrote, you just survived 2022, the hardest year of your life. You're divorced now. You're living on your own. You survived that shit. Now is the time for greatness. Now is the time for you to chase greatness. If you're going to chase anything, chase greatness. And that started for me when I started asking myself, I got really curious about myself. I started asking myself, why do I act the way I act? Why do I behave the way I behave? Why do I respond the way I respond? And it started opening so many doors about who I was or who I thought I was. And I just, all it took was getting curious with myself. Why am I doing, why do I do the things that I do? Yeah. And you can dig into that stuff. And that's the stuff where you can put 1% effort and find small, achievable little things that you're like, oh, I don't have to act that way anymore. I understand that about myself because I understand myself. I don't have to act that way anymore.

Danny: Yeah, I agree with you 100%. Learning more about yourself only benefits you. Only benefits you. There's no negative to it. Finding out what makes you tick, what makes you struggle, what makes you happy, what makes you want to be better, want to strive to be better, those little things, finding that about yourself can only lead to growth. But when you start beating up yourself and you start like trying to mask and trying to pseudo-self and trying to shadow, live in the shadows and not be actually who you are and not give a shit who you are because it's okay to play a part, that's gonna get old. And you're gonna get tired and you're gonna get tired of doing that shit and eventually… you're going to start to struggle.

Tyler: I mean, that is the crux of Man In, is it not? It is. That's where it starts. You just get curious about yourself. You turn off all of the outside noise, all of the society, the things society says you should be, all of the things your spouse says you should be, all of the things that your job says you should be. And you start defining those for yourself.

Danny: Yeah, that's interesting. It's crazy because I've gone a full year before without drinking. And people know that about me. And they're always so curious about how I did it. They always want to know, like, what about when this came up? What about this holiday? What about that? And I was always like, yeah, I said no. I said no because… No matter what I knew, I knew if I just had that one beer, just that one taste, it wouldn't be as satisfying as accomplishing something that I knew was going to be challenging. And when you challenge yourself in anything, in any shape, any capacity, nothing is going to be more satisfying than actually accomplishing that and finishing that challenge to yourself, right? Learning about yourself, growing inside, When you start to struggle, look in and become curious, like, why am I struggling today? Why do I want that? Why do I want to have this fix right now? And you can always look to people and you can always ask advice and you can always find solace in other places, you know, the Jiu-Jitsu academy, running, you know, things that challenge yourself to get your mind out of it and enjoying… in doing something different, right? And I think that's the goal. That is the goal. That's how you get better. That's how you find who you are truly as a man.

Tyler: Yeah, I truly believe that like wisdom is earned through life experience, through lived experience, right? And you can personalize the negative and you can say, poor me. And you can live a life is happening to me life. Or you can say, well, shit, that experience kind of sucked. Why did it suck? What can I do better? And look at the lesson I learned and applaud yourself for learning that lesson. And life can start happening for you.

Danny: Sure.

Tyler: You make life happen for you. Agreed. Rather than life happening to you. Yeah, agreed. Right?

Danny: I do agree. Yeah, I agree with you 100%. And so I implore everybody to challenge themselves to get better and see what you can do. I really like the idea of writing a letter to yourself. I thought that was so cool. We wrote a letter to ourselves, me, Misty, and Tripp, and both of them were like, oh, this is kind of cool. This is going to be interesting because Tristan goes, Well, you know you're gonna forget everything that you wrote, right? And I'm like… Exactly. That's part of it. Yeah. That's part of it, is can you hold yourself accountable to the things that you're writing down right now? Yeah. And not forget. Yeah. You know, hold yourself accountable and he's like…

Tyler: Somebody's talking to us. What does it say? I don't know. Surrey or somebody. That was cool. Interrupting us. Yeah, that was interesting. I don't know if it was my watch or what. It sounded like my watch.

Danny: Yeah, and he said, oh, you're going to forget everything that you wrote. And I was like, yep.

Tyler: Or maybe you're not. I mean, I think I forgot what… I forgot the words that I wrote, but I didn't forget the intention. You know, to mark off a couple of those things that I said I was going to do. But I mean, for me, the letter is just congratulating myself, right? You did another year. You did it. You learned something. You gained something. You fought for something. And just loving on myself. You know, I signed the letter, love Tyler.

Danny: Yeah, I'm so sick. Same. Yeah, at the very bottom line, I put, I love you. Yeah. Because it's huge. It's huge to give yourself a pat on the back, to be your biggest ally, to be your biggest cheer support system, to be your own your own support system because if you're not careful, you will be your own worst enemy. Yeah. You'll beat the shit out of yourself. Oh, absolutely. Like on a, um, liar, liar. Yeah.

Tyler: What are you doing? I'm kicking my own ass. Yeah. I'm going to gush too about brand brand opened up her letter today. Um, because they, uh, Yeah, she, for whatever reason, the kids weren't around. So I opened mine on my, you know, I stuck to my schedule and I let them when they came back today to open theirs. And Brynn was like, Hey, you're a semester into college. I hope you're enjoying it. I know you're loving it. And she was like, wow, this was like really impactful. And she, um, today she told me she put five bucks in her letter. So she'd be like, yes, $5, right? Like, Again, part of it is, yeah, you're going to kind of forget what you wrote, the emotion of what you wrote. But that's okay. Like our emotions are not the end-all be-all. They're just guide points, you know, to those northern stars. They're just little correcting paths. I'm sure you have to do this to airplanes all the time. Always. Yeah, little tiny bit of correction. Little tiny bit of correction, you know. You know, that's all those, that's all those, those emotions are for us is that they're, that air traffic controller, getting us on that right vector.

Danny: Guiding us to where you're supposed to go, guiding us to the correct airport. Yeah. You know, um, it's cool. It's, uh, I don't want to shy away from people that do new year's resolutions. If you're doing a new year's resolution, cool. We're here to support you. Yeah, we will support you. We'll be your support system. Um, we want to put a little bit of a different spin on it. We want to give you a little different way to look at it and. At the end of the day, be your best friend, be your biggest ally, be your biggest support system so that you can be that for the people around you. We talked about this before, being happy for somebody does not come naturally. It doesn't come naturally to be stoked. It's really easy to be jealous, it's really easy to be envious, it's really easy to want what the other person has, what they have. Why is it working out for you and not for me? Jeremy at work… So the dude won a motorcycle. Yes. He won a motorcycle. Yeah crazy. Yeah, he sends me this you're not gonna believe this shit He sends me this video and it's them congratulating that he won a motorcycle a Harley Yeah, and then he has these videos of these guys showing up and talking about his bike and shit and and and so He said to me today, there's a lot of people that are not stoked, that think, oh, you already have three bikes. Oh, you need another bike? Oh, they only did that to you because they know you're gonna buy more stuff from them and they're gonna get more money out of you. And it's a bummer, because the dude was excited, right? And I told him all the time, it's not human nature to be excited for people. You're not taught to be excited and to be encouraging and to be happy and to not wish that you were getting a stripe And the other person is. It's so hard. Everything in life tells you to be envious, jealous, and I always tell myself, just be excited for people. Just cheer them on, be a good support system, and your time will come. Good things will happen to you, Danny. They're going to be fine. You don't have to live your life through them.

Tyler: Yeah. Well, I mean, you fertilize with a little gratitude, right? Fertilize with a little gratitude and be excited for somebody. Hey, I'm so grateful that you won that bike. I'm stoked for him. We're planning a ride. We're going to get Danny on a bike. No, thank you. Once you're on, you won't get off. You'll never get off. He always says that. The dude is still riding. He showed me the seat and he's wiping the ice off the seat and I'm like, And I couldn't do it. I mean, I know he's got better gear than I've got, but… He's a monster.

Danny: Yeah. And like I said, I don't want to like, if you're a New Year's resolution person, if you're like January 1st and you're in the gym and that's your New Year's resolution, by all means, I'm going to cheer you on. Just remember, January 1st is one single day. December 31st, that's 365 days later. Get your ass in there every day. Don't fail. You know, hold yourself accountable. Hold yourself accountable. Be consistent. Be consistent. You know, when you get lost, you need a little tiny little change to get yourself back on that path. Just find something that's going to like motivate you every single day, every day.

Tyler: And if you screw up, who cares? Start over. Let yourself off the hook. Yeah. Start over. Yeah. I screwed up today. You got to, got to go, got to get back on the train. Got to get back on that path.

Danny: Yeah. For sure. Yeah. What, uh, so let's see, what do you, uh, so you, you have, what do you have coming up the next couple of weeks?

Tyler: Next couple of weeks, man, uh, getting back on that Jiu Jitsu schedule, the holidays, there were some open mats, but I'm, I'm excited to get back into the gym and get on my regular routine. Um, I'm traveling down to St. George end of the month. How come? I'm doing a little work down there. I got a new job. Yeah, I'm pretty excited about it.

Danny: Yeah, I'm excited for you.

Tyler: Yeah. Again, it's just a catalyst. We're still coaching. We're in that world. I'm working with hopefully the city of Park City to help develop a leadership program. Through that, we got some interviews happening with that and I'm excited to pick up that program. Apparently, it's a storied program of community leadership and a project I'd really like to be involved with.

Danny: Yeah, we're fledgling entrepreneurs, right? We are, we're fledgling. We've got some businesses that are so close to getting there and… That entrepreneurship is, we have a lot of good mentorships around us and we have a lot of, our community is like being cool to us. Yeah. Right. They're being kind to us. Yeah. They're not shooting us down. And so I'm stoked for you. Like I'm excited for you because, because I, the avenues are going to open up for you. Exactly. You know?

Tyler: Exactly. I'm really excited for some things that we've got, we've got planned and hopefully by the next podcast we'll, we'll be able to announce another little bit. Keep going. I don't like to do teasers. I don't want to tease it. Like, you know, there, there's some scientists, science, scientists, science stuff behind, like, what do they say? The active, like kind of telling your dream to people and how you can kind of get high on that, the serotonin and dopamine of that or whatever it is, whatever the chemicals are in your brain. So, you know, I like to play those cards too close to my chest. I like to keep my, some of my, but you know dating relationships close to my chest because like you you want to Celebrate and build those things on your own without the outside influence, right? You know you reach out for help when you need help and you you You really speak to your trusted advisors sure, you know And so yeah, what about you? What do you got going on?

Danny: Same. So we're training pretty hard, consistently getting back. My schedule at work is changing again, so I'll have more weekends off, which I'm so ready for again, because I was getting tired of working every weekend. We're working a bunch of overtime at work and that's okay, it's just a means to an end, right? It's just a fun… not fun, I should not say fun, but I'm going to say fun because I'm going to trick my brain into being excited about it, right? So I worked in Jiu-Jitsu, I'm trying to get those two back in line and then… Yeah, I've got, you know, the breathing platform about to launch. I'm pretty excited about it and stretching. I've been really, really putting some time and effort into the practice and how I want to market it and how I want to sell it and how I want my clients and my people to learn how to incorporate it into their everyday life. So that it doesn't become a fad for them, right? So they learn how to do it every day and just be… And just make it part of their morning routine or part of their routine to gain a better understanding of your body. And so I'm working pretty hard on that and the other stuff that we have going on, you know. And competition coming up on Saturday. I'm not competing but coaching. I went into the wrestling room today and coached those kids and they were so excited. And it's fun to see those kids… Just be excited. Yeah. You know, cause wrestling is not fun. It's, and it's kind of getting to the grindy part of the season and kids are getting beat up and sicknesses are going through the room and you don't want to be there.

Tyler: Just had some time off, a little laziness, probably creeping in.

Danny: Oh my gosh. And those kids, their time off is one kid. I was like, Hey, how was your holidays? Like I was on Tokyo for a couple of days, went to Japan. You know, they're just a different life, you know, park city kids. And so, um, it was fun. The coaching staff is, is, is fun to be around. Yeah. Um, Florida coming up in just about a month. We leave to Florida. Um, that's it, man. We did watch Misty and I watched the areas tour on, uh, Amazon, I think. Yeah. Yeah. Holy shit. I know that girl knows what she's doing. I watched it with the girls that Taylor Swift. Yeah, I sat there with Misty and I was like, this is amazing.

Tyler: I finally had to give in. So I'm like the type of person that like, if you like something, sometimes I like to push back just to kind of get a rise out of you. Cause I know it'll get a rise out of you. I've harassed my girls for years for loving Taylor, but she is, she's a genius.

Danny: I want to be that level of like, commitment and people buying into me because I was watching it and I was like, man, I could understand. I understand how why these kids are crying, why they're like so excited. Yeah. It was amazing. So earlier you said Ariz, you said something about Ariz. Yeah. And in my head I was like, oh, he's talking about Taylor Swift. I don't know, but whoo, we, man, she's amazing. Yeah. It was cool.

Tyler: It was really cool. It's an impressive three hour, three hour watch.

Danny: Yeah. And it went by quick. I didn't even realize that it was three hours. Misty and I, Misty's sitting there and she's singing along and I'm thinking, yeah, this is cool as shit. Yeah. Yeah. It was cool. Those are the kind of things that I like to do that will catch her off guard because most of the time she's just sitting there by herself watching that kind of shit because Tristan and I, we're knucklehead, knuckledraggers.

Tyler: I've seen the shift, right? The shift is like previously when we were married, You know, Ben and I were somewhat outnumbered. And so, you know, it was typically, what are we watching? It's going to be what the girls want to watch. And, you know, for the most part, I'm okay. I can go either way. I realize that every once in a while we'll get a, you know, we'll get diehard in or whatever, you know what I mean? But that has shifted as Bryn has left for school and as it's just kind of me, Ben and Cozy. Cozy is kind of getting the brunt of it right now. So to have a big sister come back and, you know, You don't want to watch the heiress tour. It was just like, let's just lean in, just lean in and do something they want to do and make it fun for her and them. And, um, yeah, do those kinds of things.

Danny: Do those, man, don't be, don't be the person that doesn't just do those things. Enjoy, enjoy those stuff. Enjoy that kind of stuff. Like be, be the kind of person that you want, you want to be. Not who you think you should be. Don't live in the shadows. Just be a cool person. And that's what I think to myself. And so just wrapping it up, man, I'm here. I'm here to support. I'm here to give help. I'm going to need some help in some certain areas, right? And I kind of lean on my crowd to help me out. and give me some guidance on that.

Tyler: Yeah, yeah, man. Could not agree more. I like this quote. I keep unlocking my phone to kind of remind it, but the quote is, show me your friends and I'll show you who you are. You know what I mean? So surrounding myself by good people and obviously you're one of the best. I had a cool opportunity to reconnect with a bunch of my high school buddies over the Christmas break. One of them just had a recent back surgery where they put a bunch of electrodes in his back to kind of help with back pain. He's doing really well after the few surgeries. I made the trip out from Oregon and we all got together, a bunch of us got together and relived some good times, some youthful… youthful… vandalism, I guess is the only way to put it. Adventures. Adventures, yeah. We didn't drink in high school, we didn't party too hard, but yeah, we did… We did our fair share of vandalism. For the most part, it was mostly harmless. Yeah, that's cool. Yeah, so good to relive those times. But, you know, surround yourself with people you want to be around. You know, find people who lift you up and don't drag you down. You know, there's a saying that lobsters in a bucket. Yeah, they'll pull you in.

Danny: They'll pull you down. Yeah, they always will. And so, man, everybody's welcome to come. I have a goal to get 20 new people into the academy. And so I'd like to, I'd like to really push hard to get new people into the academy and to, to grow that little, that little nest egg of white belts. Cause that's kind of your lifeline. And so Sunday, open mats, come hang out, come see us. And, uh, yeah. Cheers to the new year. Cheers to this year.

Tyler: Let's see what happens. Get after it. Take care. Have a good one, everybody.